Futurama, Bender's big score

So the Futurama movie came out yesterday and of course, I already own a copy.

The first thing that struck me was the animation. The quality of it had me wondering if it was just my TV or if it was a bad render. Everything else looked fine, but the movie itself looked... poorly encoded.

The plot moved quickly, a little too fast to allow proper comedic timing on jokes. As with the TV show the plot itself was of little consequence. It was funny enough, predictable as all hell, though. Overall, I see good things ahead for the new season.

Almost all the voice actors have changed the voices of the characters. Just a little bit, barely noticeable if you're not a crazy futurama fan.

The extras had a couple of good points of interest, such as commentary by Al Gore. It also included a math lecture by the math consultant, a professor from ASU. I recognize her name, Sarah Greenwalt, and her appearance, but that could be from seeing her in the hall, since I pretty much lived in Walker. I don't think I know her. If I did, I'd totally get her to introduce me to Billy West. Also on the extras is an entire episode of Hypnotoad, which I watched even though I was sure it was going to be hypnotoad just staring at the screen for 23 minutes (and it was, though Morbo does a plug for the hypnotoad dvd box set during the commercial break).


It's worth a purchase, not quite all I was hoping for, but it could have been much much worse.

A whole new deal

I'm new to this whole scene. I don't read blogs. Until recently I didn't write blogs. I'm not even sure what the fuck a blog really is. But I started posting on a myspace blog and it's been fun. And honestly, therapeutic. But I hate myspace. I hate myspace like I hate the white trash that is on myspace.

So I brought everything over here. Now I have no use for that poorly designed trash.

Tom Hanks looks remarkably like that child

In my current kick of watching movies that came out when I was a kid, I popped in 'Big' last night.

The first thing I noticed was how very many jokes I had missed when I was a kid. What a dirty movie. Much funnier now, though.

The next thing I noticed was how much I identified with the situation. I often feel like a kid just pretending to be an adult. Yeah, I'm fully grown. Yeah I have facial hair. Yeah I pay all of my own bills and have a real job… but I'm still just a kid, really. At least that's the way it feels.

It's not such a bad thing. I think it means I just haven't let the weight of the world crush my soul yet. And as shocking as it may be, through all my cynical jokes and broken ambitions, I've remained an optimist. And the way I see it, kids are essentially optimists and adults are inevitably pessimists. To be an optimist and an adult you either have to be a big kid or an idiot. I'll gladly take big kid.

I could go William Blake and launch into an analysis of innocence verses experience given that was a large theme in Big, but it would be pointless. Experience may be valuable but that shouldn't stop anyone from being innocent as long as possible.

Short Day Today

So I'll post a review and be on my way to the long weekend. Also, I finished the movie last night. Like, it's done. I also met with the web designer who is going to be making the site for it and he told me all the cool things we're going to do with it and his outrageous fee for designing it.

Anyway, Borat.


The movie Borat is a beacon to the already disintegrating standard of comedy. Not only because the movie isn't funny, but because audiences thought it was. The comedy is fueled primarily by Jew jokes and male nudity. It's a prime example of comedians' inaccurate belief that offensiveness is directly linked to comedy. Offensiveness can be very funny, but it has to be used correctly, and it certainly isn't in Borat.

Rating: 2 stars out of 5

We really should have made Cool Runnings

The feature is almost done. I know I've said that before but this time I could really just say the feature is done. Because it is. I'm editing the Curiosity Entertainment animation now, and I have to change the credits again, but that's about it. The actual film is done with a few level complications on one scene, which I am prepared to take care of tonight.

So tomorrow the film that I've been working on for 3+ years will be done. I can't express how awesome that is. I was so close last night (I couldn't do the animation because I only have after effects at work, and the same with the credits and illustrator) and I was so jacked that I couldn't go to sleep so I ended up playing video games and watching old movies. I got maybe an hour of sleep.

There still is stuff to do, though. The commentary for one thing, but it's all recorded so I should be able to knock that out in an afternoon. The gag reels are going to take longer, though- I have to sift back through 17 hours of footage. Then I have to edit it. I'm afraid that if I add any more media to this project that Final Cut will shut and just refuse to open. Anyway when those are done I still have to animate the menu, probably the hardest part since I suck at animation and this is really tough stuff. I'll see if I can't get David to help me but it's still gunna be no walk in the park. Not to mention the cover art. Thankfully I've already designed it, but I have to touch it up and write a summary for the back.

And of course as I was typing this I forgot what I was doing and finished the animation. So one thing down. 8 to go.

...Janitor

I rescued a bunch of old movies from my house this weekend and watched a few. I took a look at Rookie of the Year (which oddly enough Neil Flynn was in). While I was squinting at the screen and saying "Janitor" in a menacing way, I realized something. A lot of these old kid's movies have something really to them.

I catch parts of kids shows and movies from time to time and I always think how very bad they are. I assumed at least part of it was because I was not a kid and that if I went and watched the movies from my childhood now I would be just as underwhelmed, nostalgia notwithstanding.

But that isn't true. I caught some Disney channel while I was home as well and they were playing some old stuff from when I was about in middle school. I watch it for a few minutes and it had some real comic value to it. So did the movies I watched. Rookie of the Year even had some real filmmaking technique to it.

So apparently movies and TV really are getting worse as filmmakers concentrate less on story and talent and more on Digital 3d or whatever the special effect gimmick is this year.

Employee of the Month

It's friday, so instead of the long bullshit that I usuallly post I'm just going to dump another review into here.

Employee of the Month

A though occurs when I hear the title of this movie. There was another film of the exact same name only 3 years ago and although I've never seen the other film I can be sure that it was better then this one.

They got quite a few famous people involved with the picture, unfortunately, none of them are famous for acting. And with good reason. Dane Cook, who stars in the film, should have probably realized that if he wasn't funny when he was telling his own bad jokes, he wouldn't be funny when he was telling someone else's. Andy Dick plays a supporting role and predictably tries way too hard and still isn't funny. In another supporting role is Harland Williams who, once again, is playing the role of Harland Williams. One has to wonder if he hit his peak as the state trooper in Dumb and Dumber. Jessica Simpson, playing the female lead, has been hailed as the worst actor of the year, but that simply isn't true. Not when Danny Woodburn is right there next to her in what has to be his first major part since Seinfeld. It must be very easy for little people to get acting work, considering the amount that are used in comedy and the fact that Woodburn can get work without an ounce of talent. The only decent performance worth mention was Dax Shepard, who still floundered because of the dreadful script.

The group of "actors" worked under the strict tutelage of Greg Coolige, a relatively unknown director who brought us such gems as "Queen for a Day" and is working on his new project "Coxblocker", which we're all holding our breath for. He was also a writer for the film and considering the script it's not surprising. The story is a very trite good verses bad competition with a woman as the real goal. The script is littered with bad dialogue, unfunny jokes, and inaccuracies about work in a warehouse store. Since they filmed inside a real Costco, one would think they would have had a better shot at making the story at least accurate, if not realistic.

Watching Employee of the Month was an agonizing experience that I urge you not to put yourself though. Cracking a smile only when I imagined horrible things happening to the cast, it was like a two-hour dentist appointment- uncomfortable, boring and painful. It reeked of big money and no talent, the worst combination.

Rating: 1.5 stars out of 5

The Simpsons Movie review and an exiting new lazy trend

I have a bunch of old work that I need to chronical somewhere. I figure here is as good a place as any. This is a sample movie review I did just a few months ago.

After seeing the Simpsons movie something becomes abundantly clear. This is where all of their fresh ideas have been going for the last few years.
It's no secret that the Simpsons has been declining in quality since sometime around season 12, using increasingly tired and predictable jokes. About the time of season 15 the decline started to get steeper, occasionally even going as far as using jokes from previous episodes in the same way the new episodes of family guy fail us time and again. One can hardly blame the creators of the Simpsons though, they are going on 19 seasons- the longest running sitcom in history.
There is no telling why the movie is exempt from this deteriorating standard of The Simpsons. Maybe the creators saw this as an opportunity to reestablish The Simpsons as a leading comedic voice of the modern world. Maybe they really were saving jokes for the movie and the series suffered. Maybe they finally brought John Vitti and George Meyer out of whatever closet they've been keeping them in. Maybe the writers were so ecstatic that they could finally use foul language that they just went nuts. Regardless of the reason, the excellence of the movie is going to lead to increased ratings for season 19.
The Simpsons Movie is very much like a Simpsons episode that lasts an hour and a half. Surprisingly, however, the movie went on far less tangents then the show, which recently doesn't get into the meat of the episode until it's almost over, and stuck to one main idea and the branches of consequence it caused. Thematically and cinematically this is a refreshing change, but at the same time there is something endearing about the modern Simpsons 'Where the hell are they going with this' mentality. Also different from the TV series is the focus on the Simpson family. The movie centers almost solely on the Simpson five and treats the town as one entity rather then giving each character in the town a personal storyline like in the show. This is regrettable, because they had the time to give a little more comedy to these loveable characters that they've spent years developing.
Aside from the length something new that the Simpsons' team had to work with was the more flexible MPAA guidelines. By and large the Simpsons used this to their advantage, finding comedic effectiveness in things that would never be allowed on TV. They also used adult language well, humorously accenting key moments- unlike family guy, who, when in a similar situation decided that it would be entertaining to add in profanity on the proportionate scale of rap music. Of course, The Simpsons actually understands the concept of subtly, something Family Guy is wholly unaware of. The Simpsons Move did go overboard at one point though: during a several minute sequence in which Bart was naked, the audience was greeted with several seconds of Bart's animated wingwang. Not only was the joke that surrounded this exhibition more or less ineffective, the nudity itself was deplorable. Under other circumstances the joke might have been acceptable and even funny, but Bart is 10 years old, making this some sort of comedic pedophilia.
The animation of the movie was very similar to the animation of the last few seasons- only bigger. Not just because it was on a movie theater sized screen, but because the events in the movie where bigger the animation was suitably grander. The production quality was well below the international standard of 2d animation. This, of course, made it miles ahead of most American projects.
The Simpsons Movie is an excellent comedic movie that reminds us why we love the Springfield family of 5 so much. It is not, however, a groundbreaking cinematic achievement. It fulfills the very basic motion picture goal of entertainment, but it isn't very challenging. This is still good news. The Simpsons Movie is a good pick for an entertaining film.

Rating: 4.5 stars out of 5

Via La

I bet most ambitious people want to be revolutionary. I don't mean in the Remember Remember the Fifth of November way, just revolutionary in their own field. I know I do. When I was still way big into being a professional musician I wanted to revolutionize music. When I was in college and first got into advertising I wanted to revolutionize advertising. And of course after that I wanted to revolutionize filmmaking. It's exciting to think that you could be responsible for an entirely new way of doing something, or even doing something entirely new.

I heard on the radio yesterday that Coleman Hawkins completely changed the meaning of the sax. I think that's a bit of an overstatement, but it certainly isn't wrong. He was more or less the driving force behind making the sax a jazz instrument. Then later he helped move jazz music into bebop.

It made me think how hard it would be to be a revolutionary in modern society. In terms of science everything is moving so quickly forward that you'd have to make a hell of a breakthrough to be considered revolutionary. In the arts and many other fields the free exchange of ideas is impeding revolutionaries from breaking through. As anyone begins to have revolutionary thoughts or progress the community gets involved and progresses it as a whole. So the revolutionary is just a small part of the actual revolution-which is appropriately more gradual, and might not be called a revolution at all, just progress. And even if you are fully responsible who's to say it will be accredited to you? The community will probably get credit regardless.

And even without free communication interrupting the artistic revolutions, can there be progress? Now without strict guidelines on what gets shown (free communication strikes again) artists have explored areas they simply wouldn't have been able to get noticed a few years back. In filmmaking I could tie the camera from my doodle and spin in circles until I made myself sick and I wouldn't be doing anything original. And I hate to say it, but musicians are quickly becoming useless. Pretty soon we'll have the technology for computers to write and perform just about everything but vocals. And even vocals won't be all that far away. I'm sure there will always be human musicians because you can't simulate real emotions, but I'm not sure how much longer they'll matter.


It seems like revolution is all but dead. Except for the violent kind, which, admittedly would probably be fun. So I suppose the chances of anyone from our generation being a revolutionary is pretty slim. But I'll keep striving for revolutionary and hope to land somewhere in between excellent and groundbreaking.

Age

On Friday I went out with a whole bunch of coworkers to send off an account guy who is moving to LA. It was a blast, Mullen picked up the tab at the first bar and then people kept buying me beers. And finally, I was able to actually relate to coworkers and talk to them about non-work stuff for more than a few minutes.

But a group of people I was talking to kept asking my age. I forget how it came up, but I avoided the subject so clumsily that I was hounded by the question all night. They guessed that I was 25. Pretty common, most people think I'm older than I am. But I don't usually avoid the subject.

It made me think about age. How it affects us differently in different social circles. I didn't want to tell my work friends about my age because they are tied to work, and in work age is tied to power. And regardless of what anyone says to the contrary, power affects friendships. The more of a difference in power the tougher it is to relate to someone. That's why it's hard to be friends with your boss (also because everyone seems to think their boss is a douche). That's why celebrities have famous friends more often then they have non-famous ones.

Well, hell. This isn't about at all what I had planned for it to be about. I suppose I'll have to talk about age another time. This is just a random smattering of ideas.

On a side note, one of the people I talked to was a copywriter. We talked a lot about copywriting and the business. In the end she had me feeling much better about it. On the other hand she encouraged me to go into it just because I'm funny… which really makes me reconsider how tough it is to write copy. This at least helps clear things up though, hearing about it from a copywriter's perspective. A drunk, honest copywriter.

Advice

When it comes to relationships I hear 2 pieces of advice very often. One is along the lines of- don't settle, don't be co-dependent, you can love someone and still not be right for each other, you can do better. The other is along the lines of- you have to take the good with the bad, no one is perfect, you have to love a person's flaws, if you don't pick someone you'll be alone forever, etc. Often this stuff is coming from the same person.

So I've decided that when it comes to relationships- no one has any fucking clue what they're talking about, and I find that makes a lot of sense. People who have been married for 40 year, dear abby, dr. phil, whoever- they are all going to give you a hackneyed line about communication or some bullshit. Yeah, hackneyed lines actually mean something when giving advice about other stuff- like in filmmaking when someone says it will be better with music, that's almost always true. But human behavior can't be contained by a rhyming phrase like other, more simple things can.

Love is stupid, unpredictable and powerful. If you trust that to Dr. Phil, good luck.

Stupidity and reason

Like most people, I can't stand stupidity. Being smarter than most people it's worse for me (not to be egotistical, just realistic). A ballpark average says I'm smarter than 97% of all people. I estimate this makes 90% of people mind bogglingly stupid to me.

Now this is nothing new. I've always had to deal with stupid people. Hell, in middle and elementary school I used to ask stupid questions so I didn't seem too smart and fit in better. In fact, I still catch myself asking questions I already know the answer to. Hard habit to break. Anyway, what is new is this aching desire to make people realize how stupid they are. Its unhealthy and superior, but I can't help it.

Mostly it comes when in an argument. I like to debate, but I tend to get heated, particularly when I form a well thought out argument based on logic and I get an unintelligible retort that consists of non-sequiturs. Or, I often get told that someone just has a differing opinion. Well I've got news for you, just because more than one conflicting opinion can be valid; it doesn't mean every opinion is valid just because it's opinion. Fuckin hippies.

Pepper goes west

I took Pepper for a good long walk yesterday. We went down to Hollywood video and returned some extremely late movies, and then we went around my apartment complex to see what was there.

Two things were very, very wrong though.

First, Pepper pooped like 7 times and peed like 12. I know why she did it- she thinks outside means she should do her business, and she tries very hard to please. But what I don't get is how she did it- after the 4th or 5th poop, I was just baffled at where it could be coming from.

Also yesterday was November 6th. I went outside in cargos, a t-shirt and a light sweatshirt over it. It was a little brisk, but we were out for an hour or so and it wasn't uncomfortable. No one told me to prepare for the drastic change in weather from just a few hours away. Which it's nice here, the weather. If I didn't have central air, I'd probably be saying it's too hot, but it's temprate, yet not so freakin cold in the winter. I think I'm going to enjoy the balmy november nights.

Bowling for creatives

In advertising, the creative directors, writers and art directors are called creatives. Now, I've wanted to be a copywriter since I got into my advertising major and learned what a copywriter did. After that I got into the film scene. Since then I've had aspirations to be a screenwriter, director, editor, and producer. Not at all at the same time and not with the same intensity. I also like advertising as an industry, so I've thought of mixing the two worlds, like I'm doing now or going to work for a production company that does spots.

Recently I've had a bunch of career prods, and I'm not sure what direction I should take. I suppose there are a few options:

Copywriter: Pretty cool and not terribly hard to get into in comparison with the rest of my job specs. However, I've seen how young copywriters get treated and it's not pretty. In the end they answer to some know-nothing creative director. And if you don't like your job you're pretty much screwed because you're going to be there 60 hours a week. Plus, this will probably involve 2 more years of school- it's required at mullen and it would probably be a good idea for anywhere. Also, I would go crazy if I wasn't making films, and the extra time at work would make it hard to even have that as a hobby.

Director: Hah. How many people aspire to this? True, I have actual talent, but the only improves the odd very slightly. The only way I'm ever going to get to do this is if I produce the films myself. Which, if I come into some money or find a wealthy investor who is interested in the art of film and not making money- I could do some equally unlikely thing. And when I say wealthy, I mean it. I have 4 feature ideas I'm working on right now. The cheapest to produce at a rock bottom budget would be 75,000. It was all fun and games in college, but the gig's up, sweetheart.

Editor: Well, I've got and I'm getting experience. I could probably break into the big times as soon as I get to do something worth showing at mullen. But I'm not sure this is for me. I've got some skill at composition, but being in advertising I'm asked to do all sorts of stuff like animation and sound design. And judging by the trend of the business, there might not be a place for a straight composition editor like myself who sucks horribly at animation. Also in many things I do I get to be told how to edit by people who wouldn't know how to digitize media. I'm sure it's worse in an industry like advertising where not everyone is in production, but I know a good many directors who don't know jack about production. Besides, forfeiting creative control every time the director wants me too, even if he does a good job, isn't my idea of a fun time.

Producer: I don't think my heart can take this job. I have an easy in- I've been told a number of times that I might have to be moved to production if business keeps up. Once I work in advertising production it would be easy to move to whatever media I want to work in. But it's a ton of pressure. I like the leadership of the role, but again, I'm not sure my heart can take stopping every time something goes wrong in ANY facet of production. On the other hand, it's a good position for someone like me, who is well rounded and has touched every possible job in filmmaking.

Screenwriter: This would be pretty cool, but it's something I can try to get into while working in another job. Also, even if I got steady work as a writer, I'd still not be happy unless I got to do something else during production. I'm writing 2 feature scripts right now to send to studios that I've already decided if I can sell them, I'm using the money to fund one of my other productions on the table.

So I have any number of complicated options, with the nagging fear that I won't be happy no matter what I do, and that if I go into film and 'make it' that I'll be restless because I'll have no where to go from there. Right now, I'm trying to decide where to make my next step. 3 things have happened very recently that could open a career for me.


1) The writer's strike- I was only half joking when I said I was going to be a treacherous scab. I'm blazing through one of the feature screenplays I'm working on and hopefully by the time it's ready to go the studios will be eager to hear from writers.

2) I just got a form in my e-mail asking me where I see my career heading. If I write in that I'm planning to go into producing, I'll probably be in LA by next week, and I'm not exaggerating.

3) I just got invited to go bowling with the creatives(agency event, pretty much everyone is going to be there). A good many of them owe me a favor(that's the great part about having a job no one else can do without training, people think they owe you just for doing your job). If I ask them about agencies that don't require portfolio school, or to help me put a book together, or to put in a good word for me at VCU, miami or brainco (the only portfolio schools I really want to go to) I have a great shot at being a copywriter or in portfolio school by the time my lease is up.

So really that next step is almost as baffling as long term goals.

Ethics and progress

As we move through life, we face ethical questions every day. Many of these are theoretical, hypothetical and suppositional. When we answer, we often qualify that we wouldn't know unless we were in that situation. And even if we don't include that in our answer- in fact, even if we believe we really know how we would behave- we never really know until it is time to make a decision. In these decisions we find out volumes about ourselves. Unfortunately, these are just the kinds of situations that it is human nature to avoid. That's probably why so many people go through life with such a shallow understanding of themselves.

Anyway, I say this because I've come to an ethical group of questions recently and I was honestly surprised at my answers:

Q:Is it OK for me to use the screenwriter's strike to boost my own career?

A: Why yes, yes it is.


Q:Is it OK for me to hope the screenwriter's strike goes on for a good long while so I can get something written, out and read by a reader?

A: Why yes, yes it is.


Q:Is it OK for me, if given the opportunity, to play both sides of the street to keep the strike going as long as possible a la Bart Simpson?

A: Why? Do you know someone I can manipulate?



But in all seriousness- I'm not in the writer's guild and I don't want more money from DVD sales so I'm not sure what loyalty I should be showing, so i'm not going to show any.

Big brother probably thinks I’m gay.

In my recent flourish of not realizing what is happening until much later, I'm thinking that the big brother organization probably thinks I'm gay due to an interview I gave them earlier this week.

As I've told some of you, and made some of you fill out paperwork for, I've been going through the process to become a big brother, or their outrageously stupid name for it- big (I wasn't aware I was inducting a kid into an f'n fraternity). It's pretty lengthy, as it should be, and I went in for like the 7th step of the process which is a long interview about all sorts of stuff, trying to match an adult (hehe, I'm an adult) with a child and probably the continual look out for pedophiles.

They asked about how I felt about homosexuality. I just said that I felt it was perfectly ok, but I think I paused too long before answering and might have had what could be interpreted as a smirk on my face when I said it.

Then they asked me about my 'dating patterns'. I just stared at the girl interviewing until she explained what she meant. She asked if I had a girlfriend and if I dated. I laughed and said that I didn't have a girlfriend (I can imagine how that would be funny to a gay man) and that I didn't really date because I just got out of a relationship.

And then she asked about what I like to do for fun, if I went to clubs or anything. I told her I'd go do stuff occasionally but I wasn't about to go dancing at the Odyssey (local gay club, also the only club in Winston).

Based on their overall conservative appearance, I'm not sure what that means.

I think I saved some old woman’s life yesterday

I'm just now realizing it, but I think some old woman is not dead because of me. Which is odd because of all the old people I've beaten over the years, clockwork orange style.

Anyway, I ran into walmart on my lunch break to grab candy for the little assholes who were going to be begging for it later on that night. When I was standing there looking at the cheapest candy I could find, the Halloween display that was on the top shelf began to fall. Now anyone who knows me well knows that I have outrageous reflexes for stuff like this and instinctually I moved in, reached up and caught it. It was heavy, and my arms naturally bent to accommodate the weight. As I struggle to balance the thing above my head I look over and the weighted end is hovering ominously right above an old lady's head. She gives me a blank look that clearly says "What is going on?" and goes right on back to looking at candy.

Eventually a staff member came over and helped me push it back onto the shelf. Apparently, some idiot had unplugged it and it was a load baring plug. I suppose because the old woman was so senile and oblivious (she actually eventually noticed, but thought I was trying to get it down to buy it), and that I had forgotten to put on my tights and cape, I just didn't think about it. I'm sure the display is back in a precarious position so walmart can stock one more box of product on the shelves.